In Which I elaborate upon my laggardness

The great danger in writing the first draft is being consumed with a constant nagging thought:

This is REALLY stupid.

It happens to me quite often. I'll be composing one of my scenes and I'll be thinking, "this is straight up, giggle inducing moronity. And if this is bad, it means the whole thing is bad, so I should probably just scrap it."

These are not helpful thoughts. They are the sort of thoughts that lead me to metaphorically throw my computer away in disgust and find other things to distract me for a couple weeks. Eventually I'll come back to the manuscript, I'll reread what I wrote, and I'll declare, "Hey, this isn't so bad. I mean, it's pretty bad, but it's salvageable. In the second draft."

Yes, what any writer must remember is in the first draft, you're not writing the book. You're writing the blueprints for the book you mean to write. The second draft is where that actual book begins to take shape, and the third draft is where you sheepishly begin to show the work to others. But it's getting through draft one which is the true terror of the whole messy process. And I'm only offering this here as an explanation for why it's been taking me so damn long to finish this thing. I don't think prolific writers like Stephen King or Joyce Carol Oates deals with this sort of problem, but I'd imagine Thomas Harris and Donna Tartt have days like I often have. Not that I want to put myself in their company. At this point, I'm still sub-Stephanie Meyers. But at least I know it and plan to do something about it.

End therapy session. Cue group hug. More to follow.

-EtotheWoh

Coming soon to a BLANK near you...

"You don't need to be a ghost to haunt something."

If Revenant were a movie poster, I think some variant of the above would likely be the tag-line.

Erik's Top Twenty Albums of 2009 (the simple version)

I had a big long post with paragraphs and paragraphs about my top albums of 2009, but I can't even stand to look at it, so you're just going to get a simple list, and you're going to like it. The great Wohlrabe hath spoken!

20. Jars of Clay - The Long Fall Back to Earth

19. Animal Collective - Merriweather Post Pavillion

18. The Big Pink - A Brief History of Love

17. Paramore - brand new eyes

16. St. Vincent - Actor

15. The Dream - Love Vs. Money

14. Wale - Attention Deficit

13. Rihanna - Rated R

12. Tegan and Sara - Sainthood

11. Lady Gaga - The Fame Monster

10. Dirty Projectors - Bitte Orca

9. yeah yeah yeahs - It's Blitz

8. Mastodon - Crack the Skye

7. Jay Z- The Blueprint III

6. The Lonely Island - Incredibad

5. Spinnerette - Spinnerette

4. Kid Sister - Ultraviolet

3. Alicia Keys - The Element of Freedom

2. The Avett Brothers - I and Love and You

1. The Decemberists - The Hazards of Love

Honorable mention goes to my boys in BG20. You kept things locked down on your debut full length, and don't belong on some numerical list.

Top Ten Movies of 2009 (and more!)

2009 marked the first year in my adult life where seeing films didn't feel like a mandatory activity, a reality indicated by the relative dearth of smaller independent pictures and documentaries from this list. Despite this, I managed to come up with a list of 11 very good to outright amazing movies I saw in 2009. No leaking over into 2010 on this one. All of these 2009 releases were seen by me in the confines of those 12 months. Without further adieu, let's get to a special award:

Special Jury (of one) Prize:

Adventureland (Written and Directed by Greg Mottola)

This film holds a special place in my heart because it deals with the trials and travails of amusement park workers. As many who did the Valleyfair thing for a couple summers will attest, working in a park is its own special little hell, with some bright spots that manage to shine through. So it goes with the characters of Greg Mottola’s follow-up to Superbad. Jesse Eisenberg does a good job playing awkward; indeed he comes to it more naturally than Michael Cera, his clearest contemporary at this point. Kristen Stewart is essentially playing Bella Swan again, but it's less annoying here. Martin Starr and Ryan Reynolds do good supporting work, and Bill Hader and Kristen Wigg tend to get the best lines as the amusement park managers.It’s a small film and it didn’t do very well box office wise, but I think it’ll age well.

#10 Up (Written and Directed by Pete Docter & Bob Petersen)

At this point it would be more interesting if Pixar made a bad film. They’re still batting a perfect record, though I think Up has been a little overhyped. The best emotional moments of the film happen in the first five minutes, and while the comedy is great and the animation beautiful, it has the most conventional denouement of any Pixar film to date, ending in a fight between hero and villain. The fact that both characters are geezers makes it somewhat amusing, but after back to back amazing endings in Wall-E and Ratatouille, it’s a bit of a let-down. I’d rate it in the middle of the canon, but being in the middle of the Pixar canon is like being twice as good as the best Dreamworks Animated film.

#9 Watchmen (Written by Alex Tse & David Hayter; Directed by Zack Snyder)

I’d make an argument that this was the most ambitious, challenging tent-pole film released in 2009. My original review still stands, but I’ll add that Zack Snyder’s director’s cut is the superior version of this film. Though it runs longer, it's actually paced better, with less choppy shifts of tone and more character development time. It's still the best adaptation we’re likely to get of Alan Moore’s difficult work. It’s too bad the film didn’t do better box office, but at least we can console ourselves knowing Warner Bros. won’t try to make Watchmen 2: Watch Harder.

#8 District 9 (Written by Neil Blomkamp & Terri Tatchell; Directed by Neil Blomkamp)

Neil Blomkamp is this year’s breakout star for the geek set. I’d seen ‘Alive in Joburg,’ the short film District 9 is adapted from, so I knew what Blomkamp could do with no money. Give him 30 million dollars and he made an epic. District 9 has amazing special effects, but what makes it truly special is the unique story it tells. The docudrama feel is cool, and when the film switches to a more traditional narrative structure midway through, the transition doesn't call attention to itself. Sharlto Copley gives an amazing performance, especially considering he's never acted before this. It makes me glad the Halo film fell apart; otherwise, we might never have seen this. Bring on District 10!

#7 Ponyo (Written and Directed by Hayao Miyazaki)

Hayao Miyazaki is my favorite filmmaker. Ponyo is definitely the slightest of his films (seriously, it makes Totoro look like Proust), but the animation is delightful, and especially impressive considering it is completely hand drawn. Think about that. An animated film in 2009 made without computers! The storm sequences are trippy and beautiful, and though there isn't much of a story, the characters are still likable, and the dub cast does an excellent job. Be warned though; the end credits song is the most annoyingly catchy thing you'll hear this year. And if you have kids, they will sing it to you till you go insane.

#6 Funny People (Written and Directed by Judd Apatow)

Probably the most misleading title of the year, Funny People isn't actually all that funny. It's definitely a drama with comedic elements, rather than the other way around. It's probably why the film didn't do better. People were expecting another Knocked Up, and when they realized this was a serious movie about mortality and regret, the word of mouth turned toxic. No matter, for the people who know what to expect, the film is a treat. As I said, its not very laugh out loud funny, but its full of that clever, knowing Apatow dialogue. Seth Rogen shows he's capable of playing someone other than Seth Rogen, and Adam Sandler gives his most natural dramatic performance yet. Judd atones for making Leslie Mann a lush and a bitch in his previous two movies and lets her play a genuinely nice, if somewhat mixed up, character this time around. The film drags a little in the second hour, but like other Apatow movies, you don't mind spending time with these people and their problems.

#5 Inglourious Basterds (Written and Directed by Quentin Tarantino)

Tarantino's war film might be the most irreverant depiction of the second world war since Kelly's Heroes. He continues to play off the ramshackle energy he brought to 2007's Death Proof, rather than the more formal style he brought to the Kill Bill films. For a film bearing their name, the titular "Basterds" aren't in the movie much, though that doesn't prove concerning. Tarantino continues to show his knack for creating iconic characters, most notably Christopher Walz's mesmerizing "Jew Hunter" Hans Landa. The opening sequence introducing Landa is a tightly wound suspense scene, building to a horrific crescendo which also sets in motion the events of the remainder of the film, including an alternate conclusion to the war. It's trashy and vulgar, and to paraphrase Brad Pitt's Aldo Raine, this just might be Tarantino's masterpiece.

#4 Sin Nombre (Written and Directed by Cary Joji Fukunaga)

It's easy for aspiring filmmakers to feel a bit jealous of Fukunaga. He's just past thirty and has already made one certifiable classic film, this Malick-esque chase movie about a Honduran family and a penitent gangster making a run for the American border. It's an interesting movie in that it features illegal immigrants, but isn't really about illegal immigration. By not making a "message movie," and instead focusing on a character driven action film, Fukunaga arguably arrives at something stronger, a film about cycles of violence and trying to break free from expectations. The film is beautifully shot and features some tremendous action sequences, as well as the most unexpected death scene since Michael Haneke's Cache. I'm eager to see what Fukunaga does next.

#3 Coraline (Written and Directed by Henry Selick)

It was a great year for animation, and Henry Selick's adaptation of Neil Gaiman's short novel towered above all the rest. The craft and care taken in bringing this story to the screen is nothing short of breathtaking. It's hard to believe the film is the result of stop motion animation. It definitely represents a perfecting of a technique that's been used almost as long as cinema has existed. It's the first movie I've ever seen in the theater where I immediately wanted to watch it again. The story is a pastiche of tropes from many fairy tales through the years, though it's given a fresh, unsentimental spin with excellent voice work from Dakota Fanning and Terri Hatcher. I've seen this movie at least four times this year, and its still the sort of film I can go back to again and again. In fact, writing about it makes me want to watch it right now! Be back later to finish this up...

#2 Avatar (Written and Directed by James Cameron)

Avatar is omnipresent these days. I'm not sure what I can say about it that hasn't been said before. I think the most striking thing about the film is how real the world of Pandora feels, like Cameron and crew actually went there and shot this. Many movies have been made strictly on sound stages, and we've even seen several films in the past couple years set almost completely in digital worlds, but Avatar represents the first time where I completely bought the environments presented. It's a familiar story full of stock characters, but Cameron, unlike a contemporary like say, George Lucas, still knows how to get one hell of a performance out of his actors. Stephen Lang and Sigourney Weaver in particular transcend their material. And then there's Zoe Saldana. We've had all digital characters before, from Jar Jar to Davey Jones, but Saldana's Neytiri represents the first truly successful fusion between actor and effects. Cameron and company finally got the eyes, the achilles heel of motion capture, and achieved the goal sought by filmmakers ever since that goofy stain glass knight appeared in Young Sherlock Holmes; not to trick the viewer into believing the character they're watching is real, but making them not care the character isn't. To say Avatar looks like a video game is to write it off. We may have seen many of the effects and tools used in Avatar in other movies prior to this, but we've never seen them used so well. Cameron may be a terror to work with, but he still knows how to create the zeitgeist. History will tell us whether or not the film proves as iconic as Star Wars or Jurassic Park, but I think its safe to say we can now divide movies into pre-Avatar and post-Avatar. It's made a billion bucks and it'll probably win Best Picture. And yet for all its glory, it still isn't the best film of the past 365 days...

#1 The Hurt Locker (Written by Mark Boal; Directed by Kathryn Bigelow)

The Hurt Locker is the best film about the Iraq War ever made. It's a serious contender for the best war film period. From its almost unbearably intense opening through its quiet but devastating final moments, Bigelow's masterpiece portrays the contradictory tension Americans feel about war. Scenes move from adrenaline fueled exhiliration to horrified disgust and back again, with the sort of verisimilitude rarely achieved in Hollywood pictures. Bigelow, like Fukunaga, never preaches, and she makes a more powerful statement about the drug-like effects of war as a result. Jeremy Renner deserves an Oscar for his performance as the leader of an EOD squad. His performance is about tension as well, the tension between his reckless and meticulous natures. Anthony Mackie also impresses as his counterpart and sparring partner, and though their appearances are a little jarring, Guy Pierce, Ralph Fiennes and David Morse all do excellent work in their cameos. On first viewing, the film might feel a bit disjointed, but each of the set-pieces in the film show Bigelow's mastery of the craft. Her film may not win Best Picture, but if she loses Best Director, I'll be very disappointed.

Honorable Mentions (aka the rest of the good movies I saw this year):

Star Trek, Drag Me to Hell, The Hangover, The International, Duplicity, Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince, The Brothers Bloom, Sherlock Holmes

Films of Ill Repute (films that were either bad, or just really disappointing. also, one was kinda racist.)

Push, Knowing, Terminator Salvation, Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen, New Moon

In the interests of disclosure, let me list a few of the films I missed or haven't yet seen. I did consider waiting on the list till I saw some more of these, but I'm happy with the quality of the films above, so I'll just consider any of these that prove worthy will be added to the honorable mentions roll.

Up in the Air, Nine, Invictus, A Serious Man, The Road, An Education, Bright Star, The Last Station, Broken Embraces, The Blind Side, Fantastic Mr. Fox, Where the Wild Things Are, Crazy Heart, Precious, The Princess and the Frog, Brothers, Transylmania (just kidding)

Finally, here are the ten 2010 movies I'm looking most forward to:

Scott Pilgrim vs. the World (August), Shutter Island (February), Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows - Pt. 1 (November), Kick-Ass (April), Inception (July), The Tree of Life (TBA), Tales from Earthsea (TBA), Iron Man 2 (May), Clash of the Titans (March), Daybreakers (January)

Top Twenty Singles of 2009

Hey o, here we go. I'm getting this list out early as a special X-Mas present to my tens of readers who demand to know what I thought about the world of popular music in 2009. Without further ado:

#20 Animal Collective - "My Girls"

...Because I'd get my hipster blogging credentials revoked if I didn't put it on here. It's a good song, though I think I prefer the Taken by Trees cover over the original.

#19 Tegan and Sara - "Hell"

Angrier than The Con, T & S's latest album has a bit more rock than pop, and lead off single "Hell" is a good case in point. The girls still do an excellent job recasting new wave for this millennium.

#18 The Prodigy - "Invaders Must Die"

I never expected to hear anything worthwhile from these dudes again. Nothing screams '90s manufactured media hype like the Prodigy. This song isn't cutting edge, but it hits hard and gets one pumped up. Great music for the cross trainer.

#17 Annie - "I Don't Like Your Band"

Annie remains the sweetest mean girl in pop. She's not really pulling punches with this one, and the music is reflectively hard edged as well. P.S. I don't like your band either.

#16 Weezer - "(If You're Wondering If I Want You To) I Want You To"

Why's everybody always picking on Weez? They're never going to write "Across the Sea" again folks, so why not be happy we're getting some nice power pop tunes with goofy lyrics every 18 months or so? 2009 Weezer isn't quite as fresh as the 2008 version, but its a damn sight better than "Beverly Hills." AND I kinda like that one too.

#15 Peter Bjorn and John - "Nothing to Worry About"

A couple years removed from that whistling song find the three lads from Sweden trying something different. If you were to play this song along with "Young Folks", the casual listener wouldn't think they came from the same group. The one thing they have in common? It's hard to get either out of your head.

#14 The Gossip - "Heavy Cross"

Dance punk has definitely run its course, and Gossip is as good a band as any to nail the lid on the genre's coffin. The production is taut and muscular, and Beth Ditto has about the least white voice of any white girl I've heard. If they can't be dance punkers though, what genre for the trio? Old school rhythm and blues queercore? Nah, I think rock and roll will suffice.

#13 Dirty Projectors - "Stillness is the Move"

Bitte Orca is a weird record, but under all the weirdness there remain some pretty great pop songs (see the Solange cover of this joint), and "Stillness" is definitely the pick of the litter. This is what Indie Rock r&b sounds like, if Indie Rockers didn't really know what r&b sounded like. If that makes any sense.

#12 The Avett Brothers - "I and Love and You"

Probably my favorite "discovery" of the year. There's nothing particularly revolutionary about this song, just great musicianship and songwriting. The rest of the album is great too.

#11 Mariah Carey - "Obsessed"

Mariah has used that amazing voice for evil way too often (see about 80% of her ballads), but when she's teamed with a great producer, the results usually shine. The Dream is one of the best R&B songwriters of recent years, and his work on Mariah's 2009 release, including the lead single, has been her best material since the comeback.

#10 Matt and Kim - "Daylight"

The prize for artistic growth goes to Matt and Kim, who expanded their canvas without adding more instrumentation on their second album. "Daylight" slows down their usually manic pace and adds echo chamber atmosphere. It was a great kick off for the album, and a great way to kick off 2009.

#9 White Rabbits - "Percussion Gun"

No doubt the song most fun to see performed live (I wish I could've made it to one of their two TC shows this year), "Percussion Gun" is pretty on the nose with its title. Every instrument is used as percussion, not just those driving tribal drum rolls propelling the song forward.

#8 Paramore - "Brick by Boring Brick"

Paramore should be the biggest rock band in the world. They have the chops and stage presence for it, not to mention awesome singles like this one. I didn't see many live shows in 2009, but the Paramore performance is definitely in my top twenty shows of all time, and this song made a great set closing encore.

#7 BG20 - "Epic Starshine"

I may be biased when it comes to this record, but its still got one of the best choruses of any song I heard this year. Those harmonies between Sleeg and Tryst really sell it. The rest of the album isn't half bad either.

#6 Jay-Z - "D.O.A. (Death of Auto-tune)"

Jay's kinda been phoning it in since his "comeback", so it's nice to hear a little fire in his belly with this pseudo-old school jam. I appreciate the lack of chorus (aside from the out of tune na na na hey goodbye) and the jazzy backing track. Now I just hope we don't need to wait for Blueprint 4 for another decent Jay-Z album.

#5 Spinnerette - "Baptized by Fire"

Brody Dalle's sort of solo project flew below the radar for me till this fall. Both singles off this record are tight, but "Ghetto Love" is unfortunately disqualified due to a single release in 2008. No matter, "Baptized by Fire" is just as good, a nice re-casting of Brody's punk snarl in a new wave context.

#4 Lady Gaga - "Bad Romance"

She's the most polarizing artist of the year, but you'd have to have a tin ear not to realize the girl can sing, play and write hits for days. Bad Romance doesn't quite hit the heights of the singles off The Fame, but its a perfectly respectable sophomore year single. I'd say it's Robyn vs. Gaga for the title of Queen of Pop, if not for the fact that no one knows who Robyn is.

#3 The Lonely Island - "Like a Boss"

The most bad ass two minute rap in the history of the world. I still lose it every time Andy says "Hell yeah" at the end.

#2 Black Eyed Peas - "I Gotta Feeling"

The Peas sort of atone for "My Humps" with this one. No one is going to ever accuse them of being serious artists, but Will.I.Am knows how to write an undeniable hook.

#1 Owl City - "Fireflies"

I'll diplomatically say this is slightly derivative of The Postal Service, but as I've told others, if The Postal Service aren't going to bother putting out another album, someone has to pick up the slack. Plus, that chorus sends shivers down my spinal column.

And there it is. A pretty decent year for music, though it always is if you're willing to dig deep for the good stuff. I'll try and get my other end of year lists posted soon. Don't hold me to any dates though. Oh yeah, and welcome officially to my new blog!

sigh...

Well, so much for that idea.

Reboot

It's been quite a while since I've regularly kept a blog. For a period of roughly two years, from 2005 to 2007, I was a frequent blogger on Myspace (remember when Myspace was big? those were the days...), posting initially a mix of stuff from my own life and short reviews of things that interested me. As time wore on, the latter came to dominate my posts, a byproduct of a continually dimming personal life. I don't want to say I completely cut myself off from engaging with the world, but increasingly the world became a place I would occasionally visit, rather than live in. By the start of 2008, I'd lost interest even in posting regulars reviews, and the blog essentially died as an ongoing concern.

I've been disappointed in myself for letting the writing slack off. For someone who calls himself a writer, not having a regular outlet for words to air in public is an unconscionable omission. I'm going to rectify that starting now. I wish to re-engage with both the real world and the online one. I need to write. More importantly, I need to write regularly. So I'm making a little informal pact with myself here: I will write something on this blog every day, even if what I blog about is inane and unworthy of more than a cursory glance. My hope is as I continue posting, I'll get back into the groove, and soon the quality of the work will match the quantity.